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Funny Friday: Wishes

Funny Friday: Wishes

Lowes has all the tools, materials and equipment to make your home improvement dreams come true. With a Lowes Money Saving Coupon from We Are Coupons you can make your home improvement dreams come true for less. If all this is not enough to make you smile these jokes about wishes and wishing will.


A man stumbles upon a Genie and is granted 3 wishes.

Genie: What is your first wish?


Joe: I want to be rich.


Genie: Granted. What is your second wish?


Rich: I want lots of money.

Deathbed wish...

A man is on his deathbed. ‘Grant me one last wish’ he gasps pitifully to his wife. ‘Six months after I die I want you to marry Joe.’


‘But I thought you hated Joe,’ says his wife.


‘I do,’ says the man.

Death wish

A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Do you have any last requests?” “Yes,” replies the murderer. “Can you please hold my hand?”

High Pressure Wish

My grandfather’s last wish was that we convert his ashes into a diamond.

That’s a lot of pressure.

Fairy Tales

A genie granted me one wish, so I said "I just want to be happy."

Now I'm living in a cottage with 6 dwarves and working in a mine.


A Middle Aged Man Down on His Luck Finds an Old Lamp...

He rubs the lamp and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll grant you three wishes, but whatever you wish for, your wife will get ten-fold."


"I'd like $10 million," says the man. "Okay," the Genie replies, "but just know your wife will receive $100 million." "Yes, I know," the man says. "For my second wish, I want to have devastatingly good looks."


The Genie replies, "Okay, but realize your wife will be 10 times as beautiful, irresistible to all men." "Yes, that's okay," the man consents.


"Done," says the Genie. "And what would you like for your final wish?"


Without hesitation the man blurts out, "I'd like a mild heart attack, please!"

Island Wishes

John, Jerry and Mike on an island

John, Jerry and Mike have been stranded for months on a beautiful island. One day a bottle with a note in it spills out.


They open it and it reads: "I am a wish granting bottle. Each of you gets one wish."


John immediately said: "I wish I was on my farm right now." Poof, and John is gone.


Jerry looks and says: "I wish I was at my own house right now." Poof, now Jerry is gone.


Old Mike looks around, scratches his head and says: "Wow, I wish old John and old Jerry were here now!"

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