For decades Home Depot has been helping families make a house a home. We Are Coupons is music to the ears of anyone shopping online at Home Depot with their Home Depot Money Saving Coupons. Talking of Music this week's jokes are all about music.
Dishwasher Music
I told my friend that I never knew that Rage Against the Machine was so political, and that it really ruined the music for me.
He looked at me deadpan and asked, "What machine did you think they were raging against, the dishwasher?
Dead Mozart
They dug up Mozart’s grave. When they opened the casket he was madly erasing his music...
Of course, he was de-composing.
Musical Printer
"Why is there music coming out of your printer?"
"That will be the paper jamming again!"
Viola Players
A viola player goes into a music shop
The shop assistant asks what he would like and the viola player says "Well, I've been playing the viola for years and I'm getting really tired of everyone pointing and laughing and acting like I don't know the first thing about music, so I'm thinking about taking up another instrument".
"Do you know what you'd like to play?" asks the assistant, and the viola player says "I'm not sure yet - is it all right if I have a look around for a while?" and of course the assistant says that would be just fine.
So after ten minutes or so the viola player comes up to the desk and says "I think I've made my decision. I'd like to buy the bagpipes you have by the door, and the big white accordion" and the assistant says "Let me just go and see the manager". And he goes and sees the manager, and he comes back and says:
"The manager says you can have the fire extinguisher for $49.99 but the radiator's not for sale."
Musical Instrument Repairs
I saw a new music shop in town that only services instruments made between the years 1600 and 1750.
"If It Ain't Baroque, Don't Fix It"
Rock vs Country
When you listen to rock backwards you hear satanic messages, what do you get when you listen to country music backwards?
Your wife back, your life back, and your dog back
Nickelback
I heard that if you play Nickelback's music backwards, you'll hear messages from the devil
But even worse: if you play their music forwards, you'll hear Nickelback
Nutritious Music
I made a playlist for hiking that has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries and Eminem...
It's my Trail Mix...
Comedy Classic
Just saw "Cheers: The Musical"
My Thoughts? A little too much Danson.
Also, some of the acting was woody.
