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Funny Friday: Alien Jokes

Funny Friday:  Alien Jokes

Every year Home Depot serve millions of customers from all over the USA. Many of these customers

Use Home Depot Money Off Coupons to save money proof they are human.  There may have been aliens shopping at Home Depot but nobody knows for sure. Just because aliens may exist here are a few jokes about aliens to make you smile and think… is the person next to me from Earth?

Alien Review

Why haven't aliens visited our solar system yet?

They looked at the reviews... Only 1 star.

Alien Currency

A man is showing an alien around earth

"Let's go to a bar", says the man.

They go in. The Alien walks up to the bartender and orders a beer. The bartender sets the beer down and the alien hands him 3 milk bottle tops.

"uh sorry we don't accept those"

The man interrupts the bartender and explains the situation.

"Just humour him", he says, "I'll sort you out at the end of the night".

This goes on for sometime, with the Alien paying in milk bottles tops, Coca-Cola bottle caps etc. Each time the alien pays, the man nods to the bartender, who reluctantly smiles and nods back.

The end of the night arrives and the man goes up to the bartender to pay the tab.

"Thanks very much.. He's an alien you see, I wanted him to enjoy his time here. How much do we owe you?"

"No problem sir. $23.50 please." replies the bartender.

"Sweet. Have you got change for a trash can lid?"


Earth Attacks

In space, two aliens are talking to each other

The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."

The second alien asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"

The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have aimed at themselves"

Alien Names

What do you call an alien with one missing eye?


Chuck Norris Joke

Chuck Norris was abducted by aliens.

The aliens were never seen again.

Buying Brains

An alien walks into a human brain shop

Vendor: Welcome, unfortunately we are very limited on brains right now and there are only 2 available.

Alien: I'll take a look.

Vendor: Well, here's the brain of Albert Einstein. He was very intelligent and was the reason behind much of human science. This is priced at $2. Here is the brain of someone who has watched every single "Keeping up with the Kardashians" episodes ever. It's listed at $200.

Alien: Woah, you're trying to rip me off. Why is the brain of someone that dumb worth so much?

Vendor: Simple, because this brain hasn't been used before.


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