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Funny Friday: Property Jokes

Funny Friday:  Property Jokes

Home Depot helps all kinds of people with all sorts of property maintenance, repair and renovation matters. To save money on Home Depots already superb prices a Home Depot Money Off Coupon is what you need.  But while you are thinking about all the stuff you can buy for your property here are some property jokes to make you smile


Playing Games


My husband is a cheater, he beats me, and whenever I touch his property, he says, "I'm going to make you pay."

I don't want to play monopoly with him anymore.



Rick, a salesman, specilized in real estate. As he was talking to a client names Down about a property. The client said to Rick...

"Never in my life have i seen such a pretty house!"

"Gonna buy it?" asked Rick.

"Give me the paperwork" said Down. "I'm gonna."

"You made the right choice." said Rick, while grinning a grin. What he had neglected to tell his client was thay the upstairs was completly damaged.>

"Up we go I guess" said Down " I wanna see the second floor." Rick was panicked. If the client found out about the mess, he would refund the property for sure.

"NEVER!" said Rick. Lets get dinner first.

"Gonna pay for me?" asked Down.

"Let me think..... of course!"

"You are the best!" said down But while they were driving, they got in a terrible car accident.

"Down! are you okay?" askes Rick. "Rick," he says, "read the first word of every line"

"God damnit" said Rick


Home Security

For security, I built a really powerful electric fence around my property.

My neighbour is dead against it!!!

Government Property

The 13th amendment makes it illegal to buy people as they aren’t property

Apparently, government officials don’t apply


Whose Property?

Fact, when you find diamonds, old coins or anything of value on your property, it belongs to the government.

But, if the police find drugs, they belong to you.


Oh Deer!

Dad: I have a lot of blind deer on my property.

Son: Really? How do you know they're blind?

Dad: Well, I have no eyed deer.


Obligatory Vermont Joke

A texas cattle rancher came to visit a Vermont dairy farm. He gets a tour of the 10 acre farm, and says to the Vermont farmer "This farm aint nothin, my ranch back in texas is so big, it would take us 3 days just to drive my truck around the whole property". The Vermont farmer responds "yup I had a truck like that once"


My friend from Cairo keeps trying to sell me his time share property...

... I think it might be a Pyramid Scheme.



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