Okay, so we are at the halfway stage of 2022. Summer is here, or should be, and Home Depot the place to be. For everything your home needs this summer you can’t beat Home Depot and with a Home Depot Money Off Coupon you can save money on everything and more. If that doesn’t make you smile then maybe these summer jokes will.
Shakespeare: shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate
US: [translation] you're like summer... hot
I love summer in Canada!
It's my favorite day of the year!
A man dies and goes to hell and because all the other torture chambers are full, the Devil puts him to hard labor.
A few hours pass, and the Devil returns to see how the torture is going. But the man is smiling and hardly working a sweat.
"Why haven't you given up yet? It's been at least 6 hours." The Devil asks him.
"No, yeah, I was a farmer in Michigan while I was alive. This work isn't as bad as baling hay all day." He answers.
The Devil is still a little confused, so he turns up the heat in the chamber to 100 degrees for good measure. A few hours later, he returns hoping to see the man panting on the ground. But he still stands, working away like before the heat.
"No one could work in this temperature. How do you do it?" The Devil asks.
The farmer responds, "I told you, I'm from Michigan. The summers up there are way worse than this."
Then it dawns on the Devil, Michigan is warm. He rushes to turn the temperature down as far as Hell can go. The Devil leaves to ask about Michigan's weather, determined to wear this man down until other chambers open up. After an hour, the Devil returns to see the farmer dancing about, despite it being below freezing in his chamber.
"I asked around," The Devil says, "so I know that freezing is normal for you Michiganders. But what are you so happy about?"
The farmer takes one second to shout "If it's a cold night in Hell, then the Lions must have won the Super Bowl!" before continuing his victory dance.
Did you hear that people in Minnesota are very excited this year?
Summer is forecasted to be on a weekend!
How can you tell the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
By their seasoning.
People are complaining about this being the hottest summer in the last 150 years.
I'm more of a glass half full kind of guy,
I'm thinking of it as the coldest summer in the next 150 years!
My wife told me she and her sister started a weight loss competition to see who can shed the most pounds before their cousin's wedding this summer.
"I hope you win" was not the correct response.