Lowes has everything you need for family fun this summer. With a Lowes Money Off Coupon from We Are Coupons you can save money on everything you need for your home and family this summer. That should make you smile, but just in case saving money at Lowes doesn’t make you smile these family jokes should
A teacher told her young class to ask their parents for a family story with a moral at the end of it, and to return the next day to tell their stories.
In the classroom the next day, Joe gave his example first, "My dad is a farmer and we have chickens. One day we were taking lots of eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the truck when we hit a big bump in the road; the basket fell off the seat and all the eggs broke. The moral of the story is not to put all your eggs in one basket."
"Very good," said the teacher.
Next, Mary said, "We are farmers too. We had twenty eggs waiting to hatch, but when they did we only got ten chicks. The moral of this story is not to count your chickens before they're hatched."
"Very good," said the teacher again, very pleased with the responses so far.
Next it was Dave's turn to tell his story: "My dad told me this story about my Aunt Karen.... Aunt Karen was a flight engineer in the war and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun, and a machete."
"Go on," said the teacher, intrigued.
"Aunt Karen drank the whiskey on the way down to prepare herself. Then she landed right in the middle of a hundred enemy soldiers. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete 'til the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."
"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What did your father say was the moral of that frightening story?"
"Stay away from Aunt Karen when she's been drinking..."
My psychiatrist asked me if anyone else suffered from mental illness in my family.
I answered " No they all seem to enjoy it"
Makes You Think
What the difference between Pizza and Musician?
A pizza can feed a family of 4.
I wasn't going to visit my family this Easter, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict.
So I'm going home for the hollandaise.
Why didn't the stubborn lion have any family?
He was told to swallow his pride
My family was so poor when I was a kid...
We could only exchange glances at Christmas!