A home is not a home without a pet or perhaps the animals outside. Home Depot has a range of pet products to keep your family pet happy and with We Are Coupons you can save money with shopping online with a Home Depot Money Off Coupon. So, in the spirit of happy animals here are some animal jokes
A lost dog strays into a jungle. A lion sees this from a distance and says with caution "this guy looks edible, never seen his kind before". So the lion starts rushing towards the dog with menace. The dog notices and starts to panic but as he's about to run he sees some bones next to him and gets an idea and says loudly "mmm...that was some good lion meat!". The lion abruptly stops and says " woah! This guy seems tougher then he looks, I better leave while I can". Over by the tree top, a monkey witnessed everything. Evidently, the monkey realizes the he can benefit from this situation by telling the lion and getting something in return. So the monkey proceeds to tell the lion what really happened and the lion says angrily "get on my back, we'll get him together". So they start rushing back to the dog. The dog sees them and realized what happened and starts to panic even more. He then gets another idea and shouts "where the hell is that monkey! I told him to bring me another lion an hour ago..."
Giraffes are my favorite animal.
I always look up to them.
Where do animals go when their tails fall off?
The Retail store
Working with animals
"I work with animals," the guy says to his date.
"*That's so sweet,*" she replies. *"I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?"* *"I'm a butcher,"* he says
God and the animals
God is handing out characteristics to all of the animals, and he's getting close to the end of the list. All the animals have picked except the lions, the beavers, and the pigs. God looks up from the list and says "Who wants courage?" One of the pigs says to another, "Ooh, we should get that!" the other one says, "Naw, who wants to be courageous? You have to strut around, humans will start hunting you, it's a huge pain. Let's wait." The lions speak up and take the courage.
"Next up, industrious! Who wants to be known for being industrious?" The pig says, "Hey, we could definitely be that. Make stuff, stay busy, it sounds good!" The other pig says, "Are you crazy? Get up at dawn, work all day, who wants that? I'm sure God saved the best for last." The beavers pipe up and take industriousness, so God goes back to his list. "Let's see, claws are taken, flight went to the birds, the cheetah got speed . . . Okay, here we go. Who wants to be delicious?"