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Funny Friday: Painting and Decorating Jokes

Funny Friday:  Painting and Decorating Jokes

Painting and decorating is easy when decide to partner with Lowes, using a We Are Coupons Lowes Money Off Coupon also saves you a fortune.  Those of you who know this will laugh at those who do not, but so that we can all have a good giggle here are some painting and decorating jokes.

Painting a Church

There was a painter by the name of Jock, who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often would thin his paint to make it go further.

As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Church decided to do a big restoration job that involved the painting of one of its biggest churches. Jock put in a bid, and because his price was so low, he got the job.

He went about erecting the trestles and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, thinning it down. Jock was up on the scaffolding, painting away with the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, and the sky opened.

The torrential rain washed the thinned paint off the church and knocked Jock off the scaffold and on to the lawn, among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.

Jock was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got on his knees and cried: "Oh, God! Forgive me! What should I do?"

And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke...

Repaint! Repaint!

And thin no more!

 

The right clothes to paint

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all

these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid,

so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are

smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is

going to paint a couple of rooms in the house.

 

The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets

down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and

smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living

room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat.

He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at

the same time.

 

He goes over and asks her if she is OK. She replies yes. He asks

what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him

that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by

painting the house. He then asks her why she has a ski jacket

over her fur coat. She replies that she was reading the

directions on the paint can and they said....

FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS.

 

Silly Funnies

Q: What did Michelangelo say to the ceiling?

A: I got you covered

Q: What do you call a painting by a cat?

A: A paw-trait.

Q: Why do we paint Easter eggs?

A: Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them

 

 

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