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Funny Friday: Light Jokes

Funny Friday:  Light Jokes

This week the We Are Coupons blog has had a theme of light.  Lowes has all kinds of lighting solutions and blinds to help control light. When you shop at Lowes you should always use a Lowes Money Off Coupon to save money. If this doesn’t make you smile then these jokes about light will.

 

Abusive Flashlight

Did you hear about the abusive flashlight?

He was charged with battery          

Mobile Phone Flashlights

A journalist asked Tim Cook why iPhones are so expensive

"Well", said Tim Cook, "that's because the iPhone replaces a whole bunch of devices. A phone, a camera, a watch, a music player, a video player, a PDA, a voice recorder, a GPS navigator, a flashlight, a calculator, a portable gaming console, and many other things. Surely, a high price is worth paying to replace so many devices!"

"Then why are Androids so much cheaper?", asked the journalist.

"Because," said Tim Cook, "an Android replaces just one device. The iPhone."

Stolen Flashlight

Someone stole my flashlight.

I'm not annoyed. I'm delighted.

Trump

How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. Trump says it’s done and they all cheer in the dark.

The Light of Google

Googled 'how to light a cigar'...

and got 70 million matches

Pregnancy

What's the difference between pregnancy and a light bulb...

You can unscrew a light bulb.

ADHD

How many people with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?

You wanna go ride bikes?

Truth About People

Light travels faster than sound.

That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

Swedish Fact

I heard that by law you have to turn on your lights when it’s raining in Sweden

How the hell am I supposed to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Chuck Norris

When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on,

he turns the dark off.

Traffic Lights and Taxis

A man in a taxi is shocked with the cabbie runs right through a red light...

He shouts "Hey, are you crazy? You just ran that light!"

The cabbie says, "Don't worry. My brother is a cabbie too and he does it all the time."

A few seconds later he runs another red light. The passenger is still nervous but decides that the cabbie knows what he is doing.

Then as they approached a green light, the cabbie slams on breaks and comes to a screeching halt.

"Are you crazy?", the man shouts, "That's a green light! Why did you stop?"

"My brother might be coming the other way."

Technology Problems

How many software developers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Zero, thats a hardware issue.

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