For a lot of people life would never be the same if it was not for Home Depot and for those who know the secret to saving money at Home Depot a We Are Coupons Home Depot Money Off Coupon has changed their life forever too. Life is life and this week we have a handful of jokes about life, enjoy and smile.
Santa Claus Life
There are four stages of life and they all involve Santa
1. You believe in Santa.
3. You are Santa.
4. You look like Santa
I never thought I’d reach a point in my life where my hands have consumed more alcohol than my mouth.
When Boy Doesn’t Like Girl
Boy: Would you like to be the sun of my life?
Girl: Awwww yes!!!
Boy: Good then stay 92,935,700 miles away from me.
And the lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Life on the Ocean
A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her.
"You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy.">
With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Italy, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine, and make love to her until dawn. Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.
"What are you doing here?" asked the captain.
"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Italy ."
"I see," the captain says.
Her conscience got the best of her and she added, "Plus, he's screwing me."
"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry ."
The Things you keep for life
After the exodus through the Red Sea, Moses's staff could no longer perform miracles, and yet he kept it beside him the rest of his life...
...he just couldn't part with it.
Fast Food Life
My math teacher told me I would be stuck working at McDonalds for the rest of my life
Jokes on her, I'm lovin' it
A politician’s life
My next door neighbour hasn't done an honest day's work in her entire life.
She's a politician.